Friday, October 02, 2015

EB's Bashers & Fanatics! (8)

Vittoria B.

You made a horrible mistake, Mr. Sandejas. You chose to jump into the lion’s den. Now, you are in the center of the Lea-Adlub brouhaha and we, the alleged minions (your words), have chosen to play your game. You asked for it. 

I tell you, if Lea's assassinated, you will follow her footsteps. You who chose to elevate Queen Lea to hero status. You who chose to immortalize her in the same vein as Heneral Luna. You who chose to forget that way, way before Miss Saigon, there was the unforgettable Pik, Pak, Boom (with Herbert Bautista and Lilet) and yes, the classic Captain Barbell.

Sir, I am not a rabid fan of Aldub nor Tito, Vic and Joey. I don’t even live in the Philippines. I just know about Eat Bulaga who has been in the business for the past 36 years so it’s impossible not to know about the show. I was told of this Aldub phenomenon way late into the picture so I just updated myself via YouTube videos. I was enamored by the unique marriage of the different media platforms and the even more unique mix of characters of the “series” who may be described as funny, annoying and even bizarre.

You talk about your heroine’s authority.

What authority, may I ask? Authority on what? Television? Are you actually pertaining about the classic That’s Entertainment of which Queen Lea was a member of? Oh… You mean “The Voice” airing over ABS-CBN? Darling, it’s a singing contest. Nothing but. Your show does not even command  half of Aldub’s ratings. You were speaking of the TV gimmickry as having a lifespan of a typhoon. I agree. I also say that it’s not so much the lifespan of the storm that matters but the devastation it brings. Your winners may have shown unbelievable vocal powers but my next question, where have your winners dissipated to? Oh, a trivia for you. One of your “The Voice” winners, Mitoy Yonting, was once a segment host of Eat Bulaga. I rest my case.

Mr. Sandejas, you amaze me. You speak of heroes. You speak of authority. You even speak of typhoons. And you speak of substance. Wow. You even speak of culture. Again, wow. Do you speak in behalf of the Philippine academe that your words must be taken as bible truth about the Filipino Culture? Where did you acquire your doctorate that you write about culture as though your knowledge is so extensive, so scientific that we need to accept your deluded conclusion that Miss Saigon Royalty is dripping of sweet substance and that poor Aldub, a product of a 36-year noontime show, is nothing but an empty shell. Sabi nga ni Mr. Vice Ganda… eh di wow.

Let me close with this, sir. I do not engage in word wars. It’s much too tiring. Much too low for me. Heck, much too tiring for anyone. What possessed me to write this letter?  Simple. 

Pumatol ka. Tuloy pinatulan kita. Just enjoy the ride, sir. You don’t go around preaching about culture and substance and heroes and absurdity to an immense number of people who just got bitten by the fan bug. Hwag kang kill-joy. Don’t piss on their parade. I have read so many comments and I must say that most are amusing and some, downright hilarious which goes to show that they’re having the time of their lives.

Ang problema kasi masyadong ninyong kinareer. Hindi naman dapat. Masyadong nagpaka-elitista si Ms. Lea and her followers like you. We already know what Ms. Lea did for the country. She is world-class tapos pinatulan ang isang segment na, like the name says, ginawa lang sa Kalye. Kung ang isang Aling Carmen na may tindahan sa palengke ang naglabas ng comment na yun ay nakakatuwa ang dating. Pero, mula sa Tony Award-winning actress? Now that is what I call absurd.  

Let us be sensitive about these things. Kung hindi naman kaya, eh, tumahimik na lang. Bite your tongue. Tiisin mo na lang ang mga sigawan at iyakan ng mga taong humahanga at umuubos ng oras.  

With that, tapusin na natin ito. Aldub is currently the flavor of the masses. Libu-libo ang following nila. Kung ayaw ninyo manood, just click to the other network. Meron din sila. Kung ayaw mo pa rin, just wait for the Les Miserables next year. Tutal, yun naman talaga ang trip mo.

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